I can create inner peace.
My thoughts always take a little walk, or should I say adventure. My head is spinning with so much. This whole week I have been at my billet families house. Time has went by very fast, Sunday night like I had mentioned was really chill. I can't remember back to Monday, so apparently not much went on that day for me. Tuesday I got to go to "pheonix rising" with Natalie the lady who I live with right now. It's where she works. It's a centre for all women, your walk of life doesn't matter, and this place just offers a safe place for all women to come to, to be one. This organization also owns an apartment building for only women to live, affordably and safe. I was excited to go to work with her, because its nice to get out and see non profit organizations such as this one, and different jobs which include social work as it is my big interest right now.
I met some interesting women, and I learned a lot about different mental health problems these ladies may suffer from. Just having conversations with these women, and hearing there stories, was eye opening; there again everything I take for granted is then awakened again in my mind. It was very interesting, I hope to work some where like that. It was also great to see that places like that exist, it provides such a safe, and non toxic environment for these women. While being there, a lady came in and started talking about spiritual stuff. Then looked at me and was like you must think Im crazy, but Im like actually, everyone thinks Im crazy I am very spiritual. And she then continued to tell me about her Reiki which is the practicing of an energy spiritual healing. It was developed in 1922 by a Japanese Buddhist. Anyway, apparently she had went to a Reiki Master. And it was really good for her, and it was exactly what she needed for whatever answers and healing she was seeking.
I treated this as a sign, that I should go to this same person she saw. Since I have been experiencing spiritual growth, among other experiences, and I have been getting signs through dreams and It's getting hard for me to understand, and withstand. So I have been doing some researching, about which direction to take my questions and feelings. I talked with a physic lady, and she actually steered me away from her business of reading tarot cards, because that would apparently give me all the answers. And in order for my spiritual growth I must understand and go through it myself. And I was going to do just that anyway, since I don't really believe the whole card reading type deal. So before jumping in to something like that I will continue to research in to different practices<- weird shouldnt that be spelt with an S instead of the C? Anyway practices and meditations. So I am on my own little soul journey. Now you all know my crazy side:) I only ask for your respect towards my beliefs. I am also reading an interesting book called "deathing" It talks about your spirit leaving the body, and the final moments of life. It is quite comforting, I am also trying to be balanced with the thought of death, and find peace with it. Anyway, this book helps your gain insight to be conscious with our death and it helps you to prepare for it in the light of how the Tibetan Budhists and the American Indians used to. I know I am not hoping to die, and its silly to think of me "preparing" however, many people aren't aware of what happens to your spirit when you pass on from your physical life. This conscious preparation is called "deathing" and it also will teach me meditation exercises. It's so sad that our generation thinks of death as the most horrible thing, as it is. However, there are so many ways to die, and they are mostly negative. Like disease, cancer, AIDS. Or horrible accidents, and the one we hope for is peacefully in our sleep. With this we have lost the ability to think of death as a natural passage to the other side, and one of the most significant moments in your life since your birth. This book presents two teaching stories, illustrating both a conscious death and an unconscious one. The other parts of the book have simple exercises, breathing, visualization, and all that to make you more in tune with your spiritual side which will take over at death.
Im not sure if I should have shared all that with such a wide range of audience, because I don't know exactly who I am talking to. And I usually have these conversations with people, who I know are open minded to these discussions. Anyway you all know, I am in a phase in my life where I must seek as much knowledge as I can find and also answer questions to feed my curious mind to all the open ended questions towards life.
Oh goodness, Im still on Tuesday. Okay so one more thing. When it was lunch break at the Pheonix Rising apartment building before going to the actual Womens Centre. Natalie was making us toasted sandwiches, and she put the bread in the toaster and it apparently set off the smoke detecter. And here I am thinking oh my god, what did I do.. because it's usually my fault on why the alarm is set off. So Im having a nervous breakdown. I ended up telling one of the ladies husband about my fire starting problems. He just laughed at me, and was probably just thinking to himself, Who is this person? Ha ha, then Natalie is like and you forgot to tell us that one! As I am billeting at her house, she must be scared now haha. Anyway, so life went on. We were then sitting down eating, and after a few minutes I realize this man has a fire man badge thing on his shoulder. Im like oh my god, I told a fire man about my fire starting problems, I was surprised I hadn't met him before with my past incidents in that department. So I just bursted out laughing, because I couldn't believe the irony in that situation. He just thought I was more off the maps of normality, Im sure.
Tuesday night Sam and his traveling friends passed through. Sam is also known as "Switzerland to those who I talk to regularly". I went for supper with them, and It was really nice to see him, as he went out of his way to see me. It was special, and difficult saying goodbye as he is leaving to go home in January and he is on his own adventure seeing the rest of North America through the states, with his brothers, and Hawaii before heading home in January. I miss you already Sam! (:
Yesterday which was Wednesday<- that is another word I can't spell for the life of me, I rather say wendsday which I know now is not correct thanks to my mac correcting me. It was a basically normal day, well what day is normal at the Soup Kitchen? I helped prepare food in the morning, and served lunch at 11. Shaw the cable company, brought in about 600 more pounds of food with there "Together Is Amazing" campaign to fill local food banks. That is why I was interviewed in the first place last week, for their campaign, and because of Katimavik. Pretty cool, id say. Also a funny church group comes in on Wednesdays, and they always think they run the show, and they are all so old, and snarky. They always end up arguing and such, I love when the older men show me how to butter bread, its like thank you so much for teaching me that, now lets go back to when I was like 7. My favorite is when the guy showed me how to use tongs, to serve something. Oh man I get a crack out of those Odd Fellows. Everyone who comes in everyday refuses to go in the kitchen when they come in, I just love it. It's hilarious.
Also the family I am with, wants to share more of their culture with me. We were going to "Smudge" last night however I got the flu and that didn't work out. I know in a previous post I explained what this was, so Im sure you all know what I am talking about. This weekend, they will show me more of their culture, and I believe we are going out for Indian food. I am excited!
And what do ya know, Today is Thursday. I started work at 1030 as I stay later to tutor a girl in the childrens program on Tuesdays and Thursdays. I helped serve, and I worked on a new bright poster to welcome people as they come in to the Soup Kitchen. And to also remind them of the common sense rules there are, some people forget it's inappropriate to complain, about their meal or really anything. Like it's a Soup Kitchen what do you expect! And when I say complain, it's like, you only have white bread? and they storm off, last time I checked I wasn't serving at a very high end restaunt<- oh and can someone tell me how to spell that word? Well I must say, the food we serve is really good. None the less, there are very happy people there, who are very grateful for what ever you give them. That is what makes me happy. The motto is, "The food is free, Complaints are a Dollar!"
Today also made me really happy. It was one of those days where I Smiled, and found some hope for someone. Im not sure if you remember me talking about that man I saw downtown Periodically, and I could tell he was homeless and needing help? Well I did approach him about a month ago, and I told him about the Soup Kitchen, and I offered him help. He never showed up, and I kept looking. Well today he did show up. And he was still wearing the same clothes, however I was happy he found the place, and Im relieved that he received that hot meal and some extra bread for later on. Because I know he really needed it.
Tonight, when I got picked up my billet family took me to their Families Supper for A cousin in the families birthday. It was nice to meet some more people, and share a good meal in a family setting. This family was very welcoming, and they were lots of fun. I even got to hold a cute baby, so that made it that much better! Ha ha, Im so happy that Natalie makes me vegetarian meals, I really appreciate it. She made Veggie Lasagna for tonight, It was wonderful! It was so interesting because the Grandparents are Danish, and the family of course. But the accents were definitely evident, and they lived in the same apartment building so I went down to see their home. And this guy has so many antiques from over the years, and pieces from Denmark. It was so interesting, I felt like I was walking through a Museum, but thats really not just a comparison, it was more like a reality. All and All, good night!
Here I am now, Very tired. And I can hear the rain coming down, I love the sound and it's so rejuvenating. Tomorrow, I will go to work at a normal time. And I believe tomorrow night the other girl in the family, sister to the brothers here will come for a visit and I can meet her, I believe she lives with her mom, so that will be cool! Wow, my time here at my billet family as flown by. I leave back to the Katima house on Sunday. I am definitely getting katima house sick, and just home sick in general because I am in such a family setting, with less people than the 11 people I am used of having around me all the time.
I am also house manager again next week, what joy. I rather go to work, but I guess I will settle for some more burning of food, and possible fires. Kidding, Katie is my partner in crime next week, and she will show me differently, and not allow me to cause too many problems:)
I miss everyone extra this week. And I am constantly thinking of home.
Lots and Lots of Love!!
AmyDawn<3
I met some interesting women, and I learned a lot about different mental health problems these ladies may suffer from. Just having conversations with these women, and hearing there stories, was eye opening; there again everything I take for granted is then awakened again in my mind. It was very interesting, I hope to work some where like that. It was also great to see that places like that exist, it provides such a safe, and non toxic environment for these women. While being there, a lady came in and started talking about spiritual stuff. Then looked at me and was like you must think Im crazy, but Im like actually, everyone thinks Im crazy I am very spiritual. And she then continued to tell me about her Reiki which is the practicing of an energy spiritual healing. It was developed in 1922 by a Japanese Buddhist. Anyway, apparently she had went to a Reiki Master. And it was really good for her, and it was exactly what she needed for whatever answers and healing she was seeking.
I treated this as a sign, that I should go to this same person she saw. Since I have been experiencing spiritual growth, among other experiences, and I have been getting signs through dreams and It's getting hard for me to understand, and withstand. So I have been doing some researching, about which direction to take my questions and feelings. I talked with a physic lady, and she actually steered me away from her business of reading tarot cards, because that would apparently give me all the answers. And in order for my spiritual growth I must understand and go through it myself. And I was going to do just that anyway, since I don't really believe the whole card reading type deal. So before jumping in to something like that I will continue to research in to different practices<- weird shouldnt that be spelt with an S instead of the C? Anyway practices and meditations. So I am on my own little soul journey. Now you all know my crazy side:) I only ask for your respect towards my beliefs. I am also reading an interesting book called "deathing" It talks about your spirit leaving the body, and the final moments of life. It is quite comforting, I am also trying to be balanced with the thought of death, and find peace with it. Anyway, this book helps your gain insight to be conscious with our death and it helps you to prepare for it in the light of how the Tibetan Budhists and the American Indians used to. I know I am not hoping to die, and its silly to think of me "preparing" however, many people aren't aware of what happens to your spirit when you pass on from your physical life. This conscious preparation is called "deathing" and it also will teach me meditation exercises. It's so sad that our generation thinks of death as the most horrible thing, as it is. However, there are so many ways to die, and they are mostly negative. Like disease, cancer, AIDS. Or horrible accidents, and the one we hope for is peacefully in our sleep. With this we have lost the ability to think of death as a natural passage to the other side, and one of the most significant moments in your life since your birth. This book presents two teaching stories, illustrating both a conscious death and an unconscious one. The other parts of the book have simple exercises, breathing, visualization, and all that to make you more in tune with your spiritual side which will take over at death.
Im not sure if I should have shared all that with such a wide range of audience, because I don't know exactly who I am talking to. And I usually have these conversations with people, who I know are open minded to these discussions. Anyway you all know, I am in a phase in my life where I must seek as much knowledge as I can find and also answer questions to feed my curious mind to all the open ended questions towards life.
Oh goodness, Im still on Tuesday. Okay so one more thing. When it was lunch break at the Pheonix Rising apartment building before going to the actual Womens Centre. Natalie was making us toasted sandwiches, and she put the bread in the toaster and it apparently set off the smoke detecter. And here I am thinking oh my god, what did I do.. because it's usually my fault on why the alarm is set off. So Im having a nervous breakdown. I ended up telling one of the ladies husband about my fire starting problems. He just laughed at me, and was probably just thinking to himself, Who is this person? Ha ha, then Natalie is like and you forgot to tell us that one! As I am billeting at her house, she must be scared now haha. Anyway, so life went on. We were then sitting down eating, and after a few minutes I realize this man has a fire man badge thing on his shoulder. Im like oh my god, I told a fire man about my fire starting problems, I was surprised I hadn't met him before with my past incidents in that department. So I just bursted out laughing, because I couldn't believe the irony in that situation. He just thought I was more off the maps of normality, Im sure.
Tuesday night Sam and his traveling friends passed through. Sam is also known as "Switzerland to those who I talk to regularly". I went for supper with them, and It was really nice to see him, as he went out of his way to see me. It was special, and difficult saying goodbye as he is leaving to go home in January and he is on his own adventure seeing the rest of North America through the states, with his brothers, and Hawaii before heading home in January. I miss you already Sam! (:
Yesterday which was Wednesday<- that is another word I can't spell for the life of me, I rather say wendsday which I know now is not correct thanks to my mac correcting me. It was a basically normal day, well what day is normal at the Soup Kitchen? I helped prepare food in the morning, and served lunch at 11. Shaw the cable company, brought in about 600 more pounds of food with there "Together Is Amazing" campaign to fill local food banks. That is why I was interviewed in the first place last week, for their campaign, and because of Katimavik. Pretty cool, id say. Also a funny church group comes in on Wednesdays, and they always think they run the show, and they are all so old, and snarky. They always end up arguing and such, I love when the older men show me how to butter bread, its like thank you so much for teaching me that, now lets go back to when I was like 7. My favorite is when the guy showed me how to use tongs, to serve something. Oh man I get a crack out of those Odd Fellows. Everyone who comes in everyday refuses to go in the kitchen when they come in, I just love it. It's hilarious.
Also the family I am with, wants to share more of their culture with me. We were going to "Smudge" last night however I got the flu and that didn't work out. I know in a previous post I explained what this was, so Im sure you all know what I am talking about. This weekend, they will show me more of their culture, and I believe we are going out for Indian food. I am excited!
And what do ya know, Today is Thursday. I started work at 1030 as I stay later to tutor a girl in the childrens program on Tuesdays and Thursdays. I helped serve, and I worked on a new bright poster to welcome people as they come in to the Soup Kitchen. And to also remind them of the common sense rules there are, some people forget it's inappropriate to complain, about their meal or really anything. Like it's a Soup Kitchen what do you expect! And when I say complain, it's like, you only have white bread? and they storm off, last time I checked I wasn't serving at a very high end restaunt<- oh and can someone tell me how to spell that word? Well I must say, the food we serve is really good. None the less, there are very happy people there, who are very grateful for what ever you give them. That is what makes me happy. The motto is, "The food is free, Complaints are a Dollar!"
Today also made me really happy. It was one of those days where I Smiled, and found some hope for someone. Im not sure if you remember me talking about that man I saw downtown Periodically, and I could tell he was homeless and needing help? Well I did approach him about a month ago, and I told him about the Soup Kitchen, and I offered him help. He never showed up, and I kept looking. Well today he did show up. And he was still wearing the same clothes, however I was happy he found the place, and Im relieved that he received that hot meal and some extra bread for later on. Because I know he really needed it.
Tonight, when I got picked up my billet family took me to their Families Supper for A cousin in the families birthday. It was nice to meet some more people, and share a good meal in a family setting. This family was very welcoming, and they were lots of fun. I even got to hold a cute baby, so that made it that much better! Ha ha, Im so happy that Natalie makes me vegetarian meals, I really appreciate it. She made Veggie Lasagna for tonight, It was wonderful! It was so interesting because the Grandparents are Danish, and the family of course. But the accents were definitely evident, and they lived in the same apartment building so I went down to see their home. And this guy has so many antiques from over the years, and pieces from Denmark. It was so interesting, I felt like I was walking through a Museum, but thats really not just a comparison, it was more like a reality. All and All, good night!
Here I am now, Very tired. And I can hear the rain coming down, I love the sound and it's so rejuvenating. Tomorrow, I will go to work at a normal time. And I believe tomorrow night the other girl in the family, sister to the brothers here will come for a visit and I can meet her, I believe she lives with her mom, so that will be cool! Wow, my time here at my billet family as flown by. I leave back to the Katima house on Sunday. I am definitely getting katima house sick, and just home sick in general because I am in such a family setting, with less people than the 11 people I am used of having around me all the time.
I am also house manager again next week, what joy. I rather go to work, but I guess I will settle for some more burning of food, and possible fires. Kidding, Katie is my partner in crime next week, and she will show me differently, and not allow me to cause too many problems:)
I miss everyone extra this week. And I am constantly thinking of home.
Lots and Lots of Love!!
AmyDawn<3
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