Take three
I have literally tried posting like a couple times, so this is take three. My mind went on a walk or something, I hope it comes back. Right now I am in the basement, in the "cave"it is made up of all the extra matresses, which I like to call "Bed City" haha. And we have christmas lights on the roof, and sheets surrounding this corner, its so cool, and my get away, but perhaps I have already told you about the "cave".
The last few days have flown by like usual, things are so busy. This weekend we volunteered at a school carnival, I loved bouncing around in the castles, it was the cutest when the younger ones would grab my hand, and take me with them. That was only for a few hours, Katie and I were so happy because they ordered us our own Veggie Pizza, because we are the only "Vegetarians" in the group, so they told us to go find the staff room, so no one else knew we got Pizza. Things got interesting towards the end when we were doing clean up. I was helping, well trying to help with the take down of the bouncy castle, and obstacle course things. And the man who was running it was very "Sexist", as an example he kept saying girls over here, and then "I need the guys to do this" and he kept dishing out jobs, in that sense. Ben my project leader overheard and was not happy. After he took the first trip hope, he came back to get the last group which I was in, and he went to go have a word with this man. Apparently the guy was very Arrogant, and didn't understand what he was doing wrong. He ended up, defending him self with a racial comment, which was like "What if I wanted the First nations people doing this job, and the SOuth African People doing this job?". I don't remember exactly how it went, and what his example was, however I know it was something close to that. Anyway, Ben was like thats just being racist. And he told him, he was discriminating and that he could get himself in to big trouble one day. The guy never said sorry or anything, just walked away. We are writing up a complaint, and the school where we are is doing the same. I thought Ben really dealt with the situation well, considering we could have walked away and ignore it.
Sunday, we went to the park to play Ultimate Frisbee, it was fun, and nice to get out of the house. I suppose everything was good until Ian, the one who hit his head the last time we went to a park, ran in to the goal posts, and cut his eyebrow. The cut was pretty deep and he definetely could have got stitches, but he decided he didn't want to go to the hospital again. Oh those NFLD'ers haha, Im only kidding.. but he is quite funny. Last night we had the regular KCC meeting talk about all our events and such. We had a huge debate about our food, and how much milk we are aloud each. Things are getting pretty organized. It's difficult to create a system for twelve people, which will work. Starting now, we can only have milk in our cereal, and one other glass. We can have 2 fruits a day, and we need to initial the "Fruit Paper" to ensure everyone is taking their fruit, and no one is taking too much. Oh man, when did it get so difficult, very structured. I know it will help things run more smoothly it's just everything involves a list or something rather. Other examples are, a showering list, and a laundry list.
Today was a little different, instead of work at the soup kitchen I was volunteering at a place called "Odd Fellows" and we were baking Pies, to raise money for numerous charities. One I know for sure was a camp, for children who have cancer. It was a very long day, and I can you tell that that I won't be wanting to make Pies for a long time Ha ha. Tomorrow I am going to a charity fair to represent the "Soup Kitchen", basically there will be all kinds of Charities, and such and they all set up a booth for people to come and see what their charity and organization is all about. And people with decide who they wish to donate their money too! Our goal is to raise the most money. I am very excited!
Honestly, I am so lost right now. There has been some tension in the house which has affected me and it has created negative energy. I am just in a slum where I don't want to do much, and nothing really inspires me. I really hope I snap out of it soon, because I am doing such an amazing program. I just know, there will be days like this where I just want to be alone, and think. For once I can actually stop and think. Ever since Graduating an even before, I was going going going, and I was never settled. At camp I was moving and packing up again for a different place each week, whether that be councillor, Resource, or just time off- and with that it's like packing up your emotions and feelings from your past week and moving on to a fresh page. When summer was over, My Uncles passing brought me way down, and made me visit feelings I never wanted to feel. I didn't deal with any of those feelings because I just wanted to be strong for my family, and I wanted to finish up camp too and remain calm. Getting home form camp, I was on a countdown to when I was moving away for this adventure, and I had no time once again to think about what was bothering me. Now that it has almost been four weeks, Im settling in, and not completely living out of a suitcase, I am visiting feelings and thoughts I haven't dealt with, and they are bringing me down. I forgot what it was like to think about my own feelings.
Don't get me wrong, I am a very happy person. I just think I have been too happy lately, and instead I have pushed anything negative to the back of my head, and now it's all creeping back because I need to deal with it all.
It may be a struggle or an emotional roller coaster through the next few days, however I need to get though it or it will just be unhealthy mentally.
Sorry for my negativity.
Peace & Love Everyone
The last few days have flown by like usual, things are so busy. This weekend we volunteered at a school carnival, I loved bouncing around in the castles, it was the cutest when the younger ones would grab my hand, and take me with them. That was only for a few hours, Katie and I were so happy because they ordered us our own Veggie Pizza, because we are the only "Vegetarians" in the group, so they told us to go find the staff room, so no one else knew we got Pizza. Things got interesting towards the end when we were doing clean up. I was helping, well trying to help with the take down of the bouncy castle, and obstacle course things. And the man who was running it was very "Sexist", as an example he kept saying girls over here, and then "I need the guys to do this" and he kept dishing out jobs, in that sense. Ben my project leader overheard and was not happy. After he took the first trip hope, he came back to get the last group which I was in, and he went to go have a word with this man. Apparently the guy was very Arrogant, and didn't understand what he was doing wrong. He ended up, defending him self with a racial comment, which was like "What if I wanted the First nations people doing this job, and the SOuth African People doing this job?". I don't remember exactly how it went, and what his example was, however I know it was something close to that. Anyway, Ben was like thats just being racist. And he told him, he was discriminating and that he could get himself in to big trouble one day. The guy never said sorry or anything, just walked away. We are writing up a complaint, and the school where we are is doing the same. I thought Ben really dealt with the situation well, considering we could have walked away and ignore it.
Sunday, we went to the park to play Ultimate Frisbee, it was fun, and nice to get out of the house. I suppose everything was good until Ian, the one who hit his head the last time we went to a park, ran in to the goal posts, and cut his eyebrow. The cut was pretty deep and he definetely could have got stitches, but he decided he didn't want to go to the hospital again. Oh those NFLD'ers haha, Im only kidding.. but he is quite funny. Last night we had the regular KCC meeting talk about all our events and such. We had a huge debate about our food, and how much milk we are aloud each. Things are getting pretty organized. It's difficult to create a system for twelve people, which will work. Starting now, we can only have milk in our cereal, and one other glass. We can have 2 fruits a day, and we need to initial the "Fruit Paper" to ensure everyone is taking their fruit, and no one is taking too much. Oh man, when did it get so difficult, very structured. I know it will help things run more smoothly it's just everything involves a list or something rather. Other examples are, a showering list, and a laundry list.
Today was a little different, instead of work at the soup kitchen I was volunteering at a place called "Odd Fellows" and we were baking Pies, to raise money for numerous charities. One I know for sure was a camp, for children who have cancer. It was a very long day, and I can you tell that that I won't be wanting to make Pies for a long time Ha ha. Tomorrow I am going to a charity fair to represent the "Soup Kitchen", basically there will be all kinds of Charities, and such and they all set up a booth for people to come and see what their charity and organization is all about. And people with decide who they wish to donate their money too! Our goal is to raise the most money. I am very excited!
Honestly, I am so lost right now. There has been some tension in the house which has affected me and it has created negative energy. I am just in a slum where I don't want to do much, and nothing really inspires me. I really hope I snap out of it soon, because I am doing such an amazing program. I just know, there will be days like this where I just want to be alone, and think. For once I can actually stop and think. Ever since Graduating an even before, I was going going going, and I was never settled. At camp I was moving and packing up again for a different place each week, whether that be councillor, Resource, or just time off- and with that it's like packing up your emotions and feelings from your past week and moving on to a fresh page. When summer was over, My Uncles passing brought me way down, and made me visit feelings I never wanted to feel. I didn't deal with any of those feelings because I just wanted to be strong for my family, and I wanted to finish up camp too and remain calm. Getting home form camp, I was on a countdown to when I was moving away for this adventure, and I had no time once again to think about what was bothering me. Now that it has almost been four weeks, Im settling in, and not completely living out of a suitcase, I am visiting feelings and thoughts I haven't dealt with, and they are bringing me down. I forgot what it was like to think about my own feelings.
Don't get me wrong, I am a very happy person. I just think I have been too happy lately, and instead I have pushed anything negative to the back of my head, and now it's all creeping back because I need to deal with it all.
It may be a struggle or an emotional roller coaster through the next few days, however I need to get though it or it will just be unhealthy mentally.
Sorry for my negativity.
Peace & Love Everyone
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